Saturday, 4 July 2020

Changing choices and the start of the reality - Lockdown Stage 6

We hit the over halfway point of the year. Things are seeming to improve and well I thought there was time for planning a smoother way. but well things were soon to go in the wrong direction. With new things on their way but also major new pressure and facing a lot of anxiety over plans out of my control in a possible way, I don't know what the best will be for me is.


as the last 2 weeks of the halfway point of the year is passing., First, it ends up talking too a girl I used to feed which after telling her a truth, she thought I was a fake FA and also said I didn't trust her but what puzzles me is how can you trust someone you've never met let alone even know her real last name, I mean shes really nice and all but its hard to trust someone without those 2 things which maybe last year and this year taught me how to trust a lot better with people I actually know and meet more than once.

Then after the work bit of shop in Lidl for various bits and food-wise. Sometimes it's needed for it to happen which things will work out in ways of fun and kind. Well, work was getting to be busier more than I realised. 

The nice shopping in Lidl for £18.89. 

But minus the box flap opens it was soon time to get things up and running. But it was then time to have time with the family. Which was nice dogwalking visit and lunch with grandparents, well times are safer now so better to have that chance to make the effort instead of following rules since others have freely broken them? Plus I understand why I write orders down when going to a loud busy pub.

The #dogwalkingwithomracer in a field 

Fish and chips on a Friday afternoon

It was really nice to get that catch-up time and it means a lot sometimes as mich as some family have soon to be bad news in selfish ways. But soon it was time to get an overdue video filmed which was how to build a PC video. Which actually did take longer due to editing and work and also something later on to happen. This was rushed on the end but 2 videos sorted was good progress.

Also, Rip Plasma mouse with the wheel stopping that working 

The parts for that build a PC video 

The PC was built and then for part 2 

As time went on it was something nice with little things such as trying some rice Krispie brownies since chocolate brownies have been a trend at the moment as well.  Like Niamh is selling brownies now that look posh and could help a gainer or some curvage video for another girl which is good too.

Sunday night though there was a massive spike in my left back side which Meade me feel too stuff to move and well it was a pain, ok sure I was watching Spongebob a bit to enjoy it more to get a feel it for to help impress but it was just at that time really too.

before the end of the baking of the brownies

After the brownie was baked 

It was then more time for things to happen while I had to work in between all this which I could tell things will be starting to get busy for me. Sure there was the irritation of a real-life person that was interrupting me in real life when working and non stop DMs about stuff he can't even remember and well it was only a few days left before I decided to block him, I normally don't like to block sine i feel I'm censoring them but some people just can cause the irritation. But

Then it was another hot day and more shopping was needed in this regard. Cat pate was a thing to try and well Finely liked it for the beginning but not as amazing as other foods. Plus some really nice mini sandwiches as well.

A nice scone sandwich 

More bits including Lidl shopping and burger to fry

Frozen fruit for the health bit and some cate pate 

But it was soon time ti have the hair changed and Loreal was the one my mum used and it was also the fun time I had to do her hair and also wait for a delivery of some fence panels as well.

Before the hair cut and dye 

after the hair cut and dry 
Then it was some irritation of it burning when this happened and someone asked if it was half done but I had to plan to buy another hair dye which was sort of the important part of the hair dye. But it was nearing the end of the week, friends to catch up with.

Video editing was to be done but at the cost of well losing the internet on Thursday afternoon, I will admit did realise it was related to Vodafone of all reasons but Sadly things arent as quick to be fixed in time due to second job and the video to upload, so I had to sign up to Smarty to get things right. the 30GB for £10 was a nice way to get things done and with some faulty 4G MiFi device. But Bless origin were happy with things I will admit and only once on the 26th I had to wait a bit longer. I did buy the Archer Vr400 for £45 as an offer which is like £20 off the amazon price.

The time without the real fast non-pebble (would be same speed if using 4g router) the internet did teach me a few things and even some fun moments like play a bit of Crash and get some platinum relics after some attempts.

But then it was nearing the weekend and Pokemon Go and night walking was abound, A family member's fiance went to the hospital but not due to COVID but I'm afraid but she had been selfish and not really trying to fight something she has unlike even other customers, I know that sounds hard but sometimes it's hard to help someone that can't help themselves or make effort back. Oh and Chinese takeout too

catching pokemon near a field 

Night walks 

There were also reminders about the shoes in shoe zone being okay minus s that the insides slipped apart and were so stiff that I grazed myself 3 times when running last year as well as 10 years ago I found out some trainers I liked there were girl trainers. 

Also, it was coming to the point that I forgot how to huge and remember I might of property hugged about 4 people in my adult life.

But then it was the Sunday and was a wet day and work but then it was a walk and well that walk changed me a bit, something was said about moving to a place more remote and parents were deadly serious, which is great for them but it means just more stress to deal with. Like questions of

  • what do you want to do 
  • have you wanted your own place, this place further away has an annexe 
  • Lean-to drive is what you should really do 
  • Have you thought of buying a shop (Not said but implied was: with money you don't have but might have to borrow) instead of renting 
  • Maybe you should have someone take you on (Not said but implied was: get a job aka you work for someone and hope  not  like my first job with them not able to legally pay me) 
  • just think about it 

After that it put me in a bit of a crossroads and well makes me and still made me on edge, life was going to get tough and week maybe I have to make decisions on about the choices I made. 

I did text one friend how I feel about this and well, this was just the raw what I said since its too hard to talk about it 


Parents had a chat with me and they are thinking about moving and like implying I should learn to drive and the place has an outside place for me to be more of my own space and it's made me nervy since of it being way out in the sticks and harder to get to work without relying on buses or driving x
It's about 5 miles further out and well they would shout at me about t since of the roads being dangerous but it's the only road I can use to get o work if I take the shop on x
And well yeah it would be like it's pretty much the middle of nowhere and I've done it before but they would be annoyed at me keep doing and dad was really like you'll be too old to cycle around everywhere soon and you'll need to get like a scooter or a car to do visits c

It's more since my granddad's second home is being sold and all agreed on it and it's like £80 each of my grandad's sons so he wants to use that to help move x
Which I get he needs to do to make him happy but it was the same attitude as my ex boss when he just said of the shop moving 5 years ago and didn't really ask What I wanted to do if o keep with them or not
Like I've said to myself if they are moving I will move out on my own since life is easier with walking distance if needed , like even if I had to sleep in the shop since it's just local to what's needed x
Plus it's on the back of my mind if christea does consider moving with me down here or I move up there too so it's the worry y dad rushes on with this and leaves me having to rush a flat without thinking x
I know where the place its and it's like 45 minutes way by bike x
Well yeah but that every day is going to be painful or rely on them and that will just cause arguments and I'm the type that just would rather end up running if buses are delayed which I've done if I don't cycle x

Well it's whatever it takes too keep it going so no cooking and well deodorant and all but well it's if I take this on and moth it's a big regret if I take the shop on x
And it will be like well I should of not bothered and just done online work but well real life reputation would be ruins and it just stresses me out when he does this x
Like dad was looking at another property and even drove by it to show me but and does little jokes about the place even now it's sale agreee to someone else again x
But I mean if it means I run that's fair but well it's just going to cause rift and bigger arguments about it if they lecture me and then goes too far x
I mean that on top of having to deal with sister might be getting married next year x

This year has been way too much change and just starting to get on top of me a bit.

Pretty much that. So this past week has been a tough one and it was getting started with visits and having to get overdue stock in with phone calls on the middle of the road and Whatsapp messages for that, But it gave me time to start to process what was really making me feel and well this was really going to kick me down on top of one of my customer's panic if I can't visit or decide to start a new life if things are asked in the right way.

The place I had to park with a phone call, 

But this then gives me the lack of motivation and things were getting cancelled work-wise which actually it felt time to reflect but at the time it was messages of where can I see you or even like I want a job back or device fixed which I never fixed but a colleague has to be kept calling to fix things, it just drains on top of what I heard from Sunday.


So time just focused on knuckling down and working to pass the time and to make sure I can be ready for things which are a nice reprieve, I did manage to get the internet back from the origin which was me putting a bad password in. Then on top of that, I got a call from a supplier that's temporarily suspending a service since it's not used enough yet I did get vouchers for uber and just eat for it a few times in the past month but obviously not enough. That Wednesday I also had a message from a girl on kik that really makes no effort but classes that as RP but it shows again how people can give a shit have given and care about me more than anything by calls or meeting more than once 

Then it came to Thursday and Friday and I was getting tired, the word from Directly was getting until 3am vibes and also customers and Rosie were being demanded bless that dog even as she curls up.I did manage a mini morning of dogwalking which was different but still on my mind was choice and this was finally the time to block someone as well as take time to get plans done. 

The feelings and walking by a river 

Rosie curled up as I want to go to bed at 2:30am 

Then it was the Friday and it was just trying to recover, phone called on the up and also some chores to do with mum with some garden waste and realising another pair of jeans has gone within 3 weeks. But well maybe its time to do a clothes shopping vlog when the time is right and i get time which once accounts are done from next week or 3 onwards I can. 

Going to the dump/recycling centre 

The ripped jeans, not the button went off on this one months ago

And then it was a case of working it all out and see what plans will have left for me. But normally is on its way back and well; it can be tough with the choices I've got to happen, sure I've had nightmares about driving lessons and also di did end up self-referring myself for counselling but I don't really have the time to talk so no really replied back to an email asking about the best time for an appointment since it's just going to be that hassle and yes BetterHelp is live text-based but again it's still having to find the time and also knowing that's £65 a week or £200 a month to deal with.

As well as having to pay £40 customs on the laptop that arrived from Maibebenben that I realised Nividia REMOVED NVENC from there MX350 and also some Bluetooth earphones due to cycling and phone calls being a needy thing too. But that will be reviewed at a later date.

But for now, it's coming soon to be the 11th Twitter Anniversary which actually is not really special but also there was a giveaway planned but things did not go to plan as much as I liked them to.

I will keep you updated and a new video or de might appear soon but no plans just yet,. Plug Goose Fair 2020 has been cancelled so fewer blogposts and money and time saved in some ways, but I will or maybe might be in a shop by then


Tuesday, 16 June 2020

Working and commitments - Lockdown Stage 5

Well another 3 weeks nearly gone since the previous catchup and things have been very quiet in some ways and well new friendships have been born in another way of nearly wasted time.

The first thing we start to learn before the changes introduced in June is actually a new quick omracer's tutorial on how to fit an SSD into a NUC which I had to do for work so to make it easier and fun for things to work out.

But that week was a clear sign of working and things to come to fruition since there were rumours of a new laptop to actually review (the Xiaomai 6 Pro with an MX350 which is a cut-down version of the GTX 1050 so it can be for video editing) So that was to be waiting for a good offer.  There was also the talk of more reviews were to be planned out. Especially as over £20 trainers I feel it  too expensive for what I need them for

Which was in between the soon to be announcements of how the lockdown was going to be eased and real-life work was starting to catch up with various more visits planned and even knowing I might have to do the deal with the bounceback devil of the Loan, but I was still unsure of the route to take for this. But for now, its dog walking in rivers and more egg bacon pasties to enjoy. Plus the laptop I was going to review arrived from Poland very quickly, but it was not the 6 Pro but the Xiaomai 5 which is one I've sold before.

Maccies was soon to reopen but soon the world changed. One racist cop did something he expected was normal, and that was murdering George Floyd which he said the words "I can't breathe". Which well, that was it, the world was really about to unravel the truth which can be a scary moment but that same weekend was also some amazing shots of When a private spaceship was launched as well.

When the Space Station was passing over home 

The day after when a small flicker of light was passing by 

It was then time to enjoy some shopping from Tesco on the sunny days and working in the heat with cycling for wok which well needed and makes it easier to get the dog cooler since the times are getting harder and 

This was also the start of the protests of the times that will change the UK and the world with things, it was time to get quiet and knuckle down on things as well as a chap called terry was meant to nag me to join a protest but I did not get the time to due to work and well since a white guy might get nagged for being there filming it so that too. But maybe one day I might join one to see what it will entail and be a tiny change to the world.

But then it was June

June to start the content ish

Well, this was now crunch time of the money and the month of maybe having to get things done without knowing what might happen. But well before reviews and tutorials to start, we have to get the chance for a remake on a shaving tutorial.

Which that was a good way to kick start a few tutorials to maker a pair of 2 videos from a series then a video of a different one then another 2 series to keep the video related goal of non-food videos.  So I might be able to tick that box off soon. But things were heard with the realisation of how it's illegal for indoor meetups which means feeding a girl is now illegal so a bit kick in the PM for love life there

But as well as this its been nice to just watch some random videos of trains since well learning about things and well thats for another time. But well, thats have been between working from offline job to online, But well sometimes things can make you fall asleep quicker like traffic compared to the quietness of the countryside. But there was a spot to go walking and well, its this lovely heat we were having but June was the time it started to go away and the rain was to arrive.

The walking on the final days of the heatwave 

But Work was to be getting pout of hand for both offline and online which means not much was happening, I mean sure I did chat to one friend called drew on insta whos been to class and also is worried about another insta following of mine but well things go in different directions. Sure I got a mask I later had to give to a friend since they did not have one and also well learning about how good to get a mini-fridge for whoever I move in with as I learned how someone has made full use of theirs too, but who knows is Real on FF nowadays.

the selfie and the face mask 

It was also time to rare times to understand that years ago I had an HIV test to make sure I was safe back years ago

There was also time to go to a farm shop to get some bits and plum sauce to buy is the first-ever time.

But there it goes with saying about plans to get another video sorted soon, which sadly will be for over a week. But it has been alot of growth for people and learning either better in souls or even better waistlines from what i've seen too. But well that's all I can hope for others I care about and also how i've changed in 6 months since things happening in the good sense and bad. 

But it was near the weekend and well knowing soon I'll have to check on a plan to get things working which will make sure I have to stay focused and even accounts to happen soon. But well it was nice to get a Sunday quick breakfast.

Then it was a plan after some work to get a day in the life video going, especially as people have been asking about it, which at the same time I got to chatting to someone but well it's not really a genuine one in all honesty. but a good friend on Facebook I've been helping out with things recently too.  Plus it was time to compare food too

But then it was time for more visits and late lunches

The dark moor of Brentor 

Stuff from Tesco to buy and an incredible craving 

Atlus then decided to release P4G in less than a week of rumours appearing and then it was a day in the life vlog to sort. It was a nice test in 4k since i've had to do shoutouts for Henry and Chris.

It was a fun one to edit, i've downloaded some nice remixes I get to use and editing too up 40GB of space too, But it was that and chatting to the roleplay of more reality questioning. Times were soon to be busy as the PS5 was announced as well it had to leave ideas on the future for the main work I do but that and it was soon finally time to have my first Chinese takeout since March.

The first takeout since lockdown began, click and collect as well

Then it was more working online and planning commitments for the future in small ways before it came to Sunday and a nice afternoon out with the family to the allotments to Pick berries and explore nature. Even seeing an owl for the first time on eye level is astounding, 

Greenhouses and Rosie 

the blurry Beatle  

Thats where I picked them from

This is one owl 

Amazing green in  a tucked park of the local area

As time goes, it was nice to hopefully take friends down here if she ever wanted to go and also knowing on hard choices I might have to make in the future especially with weddings but I will get to that later. At the same time, I realised its hard to build friendships back up with knowing what to say and well that will be another choice I have to make too. 

but as June is on the 15th and as well the ease of lockdown is getting more expanded, the new normal will soon return and minus gammons being gammons and also the shopping having crowds, times will be the expected test to see how things go before we can. 

All I can say is that choices will affect us all and well we have to hope for the best. 


Tuesday, 26 May 2020

A Busy time of work and social distancing family catchups - Lockdown Stage 4

Well, things have been better than the earlier in the month, with things calming down and maybe apologies made which have been a sign of relieve and also time for videos that have been caught up, even with 2 videos and even lost cards as well. But for now, its time to really see how things have changed as 2 months of lockdown approaches.

Things get busy,

Sometimes that phrase has been a truth with myself quite recently and I will admit it has been. But with the world of work, it means I had to really keep in check with it all. This was also the time to learn you have to use the exercise to get to and from work to keep you in check, now for me I know like others, weight piles on and well actually that can be sorted when a routine was in place which actually was soon to be formed.  Especially as the chance to exercise to add many times as you like was to approach 2 days later and well things can finally happen.

It was also the time that Katie Hopkins was dissing Plymouth and also it was more of me on the binge of playing Age of Empires II Definitive edition which I also bought Chadders for her birthday since that was coming up in the week.

Things were more getting on the chance for work and well that is also the chance of me making amends with people even if it was just to make sure they were okay and even though it was from one last message which really makes things confusing on the end. Plus more walking at night and #dogwalkingwithomracer and parents too along with the Shopping.

But soon I had the time to get videos made and well it was time for walking on the moors and also a First BBQ since the weather has been lush too.

Since they have been overdue and it was nice to get them started. Especially now GTA V I got free from the Epic Games Store and that might be the first-ever chance get to play a 3D GTA Game properly.

Well, we soon realise it has been time to get the Waffle Maker reviews.  This was the start of what I can make now with the right food but I'll find out how it goes properly.

The Waffle Maker

Mini Yorkshire Doughnuts

Then it was time to get that bit added in and Also it was coming up to the anniversary of when I went up to London when my life changed for the better before I realised it, as I was starting to have the time of my life from more Coach journeys, running to Silverstone in a heatwave again and well the Dates with someone that made my heart flutter and well-learned of a lot of life lessons in the future from there and even now.

With that, it was also a blur on Saturday which I think I was catching up with someone and well it was just a day I zoned out, maybe work was tiring and customers exhausted me in between the video editing as well. Plus some sunsets when #dogwalkingwithomracer and mum were nice

Sadly I've had no luck with the condom and also it was memories in Oceana and Pryzm with typing things up. Which maybe when this is over, I can push myself with a night out, since well soon i was to possess an ultimate tracking tool which I ordered from Aliexpress.

But then it was time for the Amazfit Bip S which was the replacement for the mi Band 4, Not the fault of the Band 4 but the Redmi not 7 had such as Poort GPS it caused me little choice to but invest in the smartwatch.

The watch in the garden

How it shows in the sun

Amazing evening views
But as it was more work to be done and cycling and visits for nearly 10 hours 2 days after this review, it was well making me craving things and a feast was needed.

Those #dogwalkingwithomracer moments 

The Toasted Sandwiches

But as the weekend of the second bank Holiday was approaching, Time was not on my side especially after the 10 hour day and the day after i was getting exhausted which needed to relaxation time to keep it going for me. Sure it was a cheesecake to get for the growing lady but well maybe I'm a better feeder than I think i am sometimes.

The Bank Holiday Scorcher. 

Then it came to the Sunday and well it was more work colliding with family life as I had to go to my sisters to socially distance help out with Garden work and also a socially distances walk, with the love of Egg and bacon Pasties and some of the most amazing views, it made me feel maybe Saltash in a place to move if I get time to. 

the Drive 

The fake lilt and the egg bacon Tumeric pasty. 
As we caught up and chatted and weeds not guided on and pulled out, it was then time to go for the nice walk with everyone and well it was the walk of Forder and Churchtown which had some amazing views and well it just made me wish a few things which might happen one day. The views of the City of the ocean and even just going on train journeys soon too. 

The boats locked out 

the river to the viaduct 

How it looks in a 48mp camera

The estuary is amazing 

It's peaceful here for sure 

The Photosphere 360 camera attempt 

The mainline 
Eventually, by 4pm, We were on out way home after talking and more catching up, we had to drop off presents to a family member outside their house and one of the plants on a barn was full of Wasps and bees,e lovely to see but dangerous to be close as was, But then it was the drive home and family chatter knowing that a fiances' wife might not last long is a sad fact.

The wasps and the flowers

As we got home, it was soon time for another #dogwalkingwithomracer which was to the river Rosie loves now to get some nice cold in her to refresh her.

She loves the water 

A light tea, with half a burger, half a pasty, ham, salad and even Salad cream too. 

But as nights go to relax, with directly avoided since I'm a lazy shit, it was time to walk Rosie at night with an uncomfortable SLEEP but I did take some amazing night shots of Tavi again. 

The view of the Town 

Trees in the light blue sky 

Gardens look purple bright 

The roof shows off the contrast

Which then leads me to a day of a new video to be filmed and made on how to fit an SSD into a NUC and then later was to cycle to deliver and setup that NUC for a customer and cycle back to get some Saucy shopping too. which I mean with 2 different sauces and some BBQ bits for later on the week maybe. But since I had to order a new bank card, this was the way to make sure it worked and it did and kept in the budget on how much I had on there 

The Tesco Shop for £14.55

Well, that was it, mostly 2 weeks in may be done and now with Announcements of retail on 15th June opening, my time of lockdown is .....

oh wait, I left a premises and now can have a future with more time on what I want to do which means I have some things to catch up and really directly money to make before I can make my return Ot maybe things change and times move on, I don't know on the things to take since I don't want to go back to making myself there and limited on what I can do but at the same time, a new shop in this pandemic is a fucking stupid idea and its if people and even myself prove and act on what I say since that is how I burned out last year and Don't want to do that again this year, even though I did with Directly on the stage 2 part of lockdown.

The New Years Resolutions 

In all honesty, nothing has changed here, since well Travel is non for Staying and also sometimes is the reason to travel is that important and really I'm still saving up after the crazy times and dreams starting to come true with someone but others it has field like a game over or losing life every try, which well like anything if it gets like that, you walk away from it. So 

  • Finish KHIII - Not started gaming ones yes and its been nearly 6 months in 
  • Finish most of CTR - As above 
  • Stream more - This is above but doing better with new streaming equipment soon to review 
  • Have my 3rd kiss with someone special - Very might finger crossed this year if anyone 
  • Have a doughnuts date with at least 24 doughnuts involved -Maybe looking like a dream to me 
  • Have at least 3 holidays or weekends away - No way until lat year 
  • Make more videos non-food - This is improving in my own way 
  • Get back to YT partner - The watch views are much less still 

Well enjoy the start of June soon and well 2 weeks and we can see what drama and exhaustion from work I will face before having to catch up on accounts.